How to Ask for What You Want

As a comedian, I’ve always struggled with asking for anything, whether it’s as simple as asking for the bathroom or a glass of water, or something bigger like asking to be considered for a show. I think many people can relate to this feeling of not wanting to be a bother, but in comedy, and in life in general, it’s so important to learn to ask. It’s the only way to how to ask for what you want.

Lately, I’ve been working on changing my mindset around asking, and it’s been a process. I’ve had to confront my own fears and insecurities and remind myself that it’s okay to ask for things. I’ve also had to remind myself that sometimes the answer will be no, and that’s okay too. It’s all a part of the journey.

I’m sure you’ve been to a comedy show and thought to yourself, “One day I hope to be on that stage.” Well, why not now? Why can’t you make it happen? I know my anxious brain has told me all kinds of reasons why I can’t or shouldn’t ask, but I’ve learned that sometimes it takes a message or conversation to open up new opportunities.

For example, I’ve sent messages to bookers expressing my love for their show and asking to be considered, and sometimes they respond with a “How about the 20th?” It can be that simple. Of course, it’s also important to be prepared for rejection or no response at all, but sometimes all it takes is a message or conversation to open up new opportunities.

Asking Fellow Comedians – How to Ask for What You Want

Asking for help from fellow comedians is also crucial. I’ve booked many tour dates by reaching out to comedians in the city and asking if they know of any opportunities or can introduce me to bookers or venue owners. It’s amazing how often people are willing to help, especially when you show them kindness and respect. There are also groups for large cities across America that are specifically designed for this purpose, where comedians can post about their upcoming visits and other comedians or venue owners can offer suggestions or opportunities.

So, if you’re a comedian or aspiring comedian, or just someone who struggles with asking for things, remember that it’s okay to ask. Be kind, be funny, and don’t be afraid to ask for help. You never know what opportunities might come your way.

It’s the only way how to ask for what you want.
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Comedian Zack Lyman from Zack Lyman Podcast talking about learning to ask others for advice, help and more. How to Ask for What You WantAlso, listen to my recent episode on A Comedy Advice Podcast

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